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plaguedays

by plaguedays

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1.
stay in 02:37
i make a mark on my arm i beg the rain to come and if she listens i fold my hands and i i stay inside i stay asleep i am a rental i am a vacancy there are no doors in this house and out the window's too far now why don't you come down why don't you come down i've got me to talk about i stay inside i stay asleep i am a rental i am a vacancy
2.
new laugh 02:37
what do you want what can't i take from you where do you go what have i made my home? we're all just frozen in the light of what we'll never know we keep on tryin can't even break even always forgetting: the world is bigger than me when do i let it get the better of me? always forgetting: the world is bigger than me if i can't feel it then it ain't real to me so when this settles when you can look at me i'll try a new laugh i won't forget to eat (ahhhhh ohhhhh)
3.
i've kind of always been soft the kind who cares til it costs so all this grieving should be easy now but i'm just seasick from the up and down hallways haunted and way too long faces in the window til you look and they're gone i don't know anything and i don't want to i'm fine right here, thank you my shadow trips me and i taste the curb i'll swallow teeth before i eat my words lay em out like soldiers in a grade school line holdin up the fabric of my awful sky holy spirit, satan: i'm so sore get somebody else to lose your war i don't know anything and i don't want to i'm fine right here, thank you thought i'd get to know the dark and sort it all out but i've never looked the part and the jury is doubt
4.
palms 02:04
(i can't do it i can't do it i can't do it) nothing grows in our wasteland i've been reading your palms for good news they don't change much but your face does watching coffins filling up with coins no news is good news i can't be of any use tell me something i would do i can't draw this map for you
5.
too fucked up to take the stairs "no one touch me" no one's there just the way i like it quiet enough i don't miss anything if i do, not that much i was thinking, though about what we put to sleep i hope the dog dreamt of me i carried her to the car until we see life leave we won't know who we are
6.
so don't 03:13
help me out of bed and into the ground i took too much i counted wrong the cost of sticking around it breaks my brain then stops i rearrange the letters in your name again you can't quite say it but you feel it all the time staring out a window at the rest of your life you're/your right what if i can't see it anymore? my circles get smaller what if i don't want it? none of it's asked for so i'll just say it since i opened up my mouth: "i'd like to be alive now the way we write about" but what does it matter if no one minds we'll all feed the earth in a little while youngest child pay to smile what if i don't mean it anymore? i'm making it all up what if i'm just reaching? what are these arms for?
7.
go out 04:03
there's no right way down or way around it i lift my head up just to whine about it i feel so graceless i don't wanna make it tell me all about the other side and "how could anybody hate this life?" i think we got our apocalypse there's no being unkind after this is it wrong that i prayed for it? i wanted faith to shake and not pay for it if you were looking if i thought you could see it i could have left you some proof that we're just moving the mess around waiting on checks while the house burns down it's not that different from how we were we'd still be scared of what might be out there there's no wrong in the distance kept and besides, i'll never mind being overslept i think we got our apocalypse there's no being unkind after this is it wrong that i prayed for it? i wanted faith to shake and not pay for it

about

recorded in quarantine by me, for me, & dedicated to you.

these seven songs were my closest friends and loudest roommates for four months. now they're wondering if they can crash at your place for a little while. just til they get back on their feet.

credits

released July 26, 2020

nathan mcneill howard - vocals, guitars, bass, banjo, piano, drums/percussion/programming, additional noises
levi boyd miller - slide guitar (track 1), bass (track 1), synth (tracks 1 and 6), guitar (track 6)

artwork by Ben Nelsen

all tracks written, performed, and recorded by nathan mcneill howard in a bedroom in west virginia

all tracks mixed, mastered, and produced by levi boyd miller @ Front & Center Recordings in Austin, TX

thankful always for family, friends, and the ability to communicate through this sacred channel we call Music

voices borrowed for the Chorus of Deafening Friends at the end of track 7:
paul kessler, andrew dehaven, zoe levine, wayne snow, olivia lloyd, dirick cummins, laura lindner, casey otto, jordan coley, hannah smyle, grace manford

license

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about

plaguedays Shepherdstown, West Virginia

one-man rural cemetery pop from West Virginia

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